Don't make me talk to people!!

After that interview this week, the thought of doing something completely different, like working at a quilt shop or being a mystery shopper, sounded really good--although I am tired of working with the retail public, and I'm not good with people anymore. Still, I had to wonder why I was thinking this desperately. The answer: the holes in my resume, in particular, the "freelance" jobs I did for friends of Jason. I suppose if I feel really bad about them, I could just take them off entirely and call it "staying home with the kid(s)", which at least sounds better than "got in the abyss and got apathetic about my job search", which is more the truth (and is happening right now!) Still, I did the work, and I may even have gotten paid for it. But the thought of going in front of a panel of interviewers and talking about this just makes me basically cringe.

No word either way about the interview. After quizzing the connection I have at the company, I'm ambivalent about that. After the next phone interview, the next step would be an intensive all day interview with a variety of people. To me, that seems extreme. I suppose, too, that I am freaking out so much about the interview process that I forget it's goes both ways. It would be a good way to check out the company atmosphere and see if the people above me are complete idiots. Looking back, if I'd interviewed with some of the people who became my superiors at my last job, I might not have taken it. Still, I ended up working for people who I didn't even know at the time my job went from being temp to being hired.

Definitely I know that thinking about this job hunt will make it less overwhelming, less scary. But it seems easier to just watch TV and eat bad food. Sigh. I will talk myself into this. I do want to work. I don't want the stress of continual job searching. (But wouldn't it be nice to be a stay at home mom for a while? I'm so not even now...) (Not an option, according to my husband, in case you were wondering.)